Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Will I Ever Be Me Again?

In seeking help I was asked to try and explain what this hell that has taken over my life actually feels like.
Here is my lame attempt:
Imagine what "emotional amnesia" might be like. You are living with people and interacting with people that you feel a complete disconnect with. Your mind tells you that they are people you love and who love you but you can't "feel" it. You can't feel them at all. You can't feel their joys, their pain, their laughter. They're like strangers living in your world. It's like being dropped into another person's home and living there. The worst part is - you are powerless to change it. The more you try to think your way out of it.....the further away people feel. Complete isolation.
Each day you stumble through like this. The endless day turning into an endless night....